So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
she pinky promised me she was 18
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
