i jhust puked up my retainher.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
