That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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