You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
