I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
smell my finger.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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