discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
