Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
