I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
