I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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