Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
