So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
