Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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