we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
