i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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