I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
