a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize