help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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