Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
