She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
