sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
operation have a gay friend backfired
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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