we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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