Hey man sorry I got all grabby
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize