Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
