WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
