I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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