Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I should be sponsored by Trojan
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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