You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
