im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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