sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
