Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
They have beer where we have blood.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
