If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I want a musical about memes.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
