Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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