i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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