haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
