I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
