but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I look better un-naked...
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I need to align my fucking chakras
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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