What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
