We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize