dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
