Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Randomize
