She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You were trust falling into bushes
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize