White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
