I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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