I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
