Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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