I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
The uberlube is also flammable
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
My dick has a subreddit
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize