oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
