Betty ford says i'm here all night
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
