Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
