im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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